You know, if a man on a TV show says, “I would love more than anything for you to like me, you know” that something somewhere is missing. And if he follows that up with, “we’ve had a lot of time… we’ve had all day,” that missing part may be in someone’s brain. Yes, we’re talking about another episode of “The Bachelor.”
Arie Luyendyk Jr. and the ladies have found themselves in the city of love and once again, Arie is as lost as he is boring. His first one-on-one with Lauren B. found him just mumbling random things about time, love, connections and then– traffic in Paris. In the middle of his date with Lauren, Arie actually shared a pretty heartbreaking story about being in a relationship with a woman who had a miscarriage and broke up with him at the time she delivered the terrible news to him. That relationship caused trust issues with him, but he can’t blame being the most boring human in the world on that.
Even though Arie only let Lauren B. talk for just a little while, he called the day “incredible” and then gave her a rose.
While the group date was obviously interesting– the ladies went to Moulin Rouge to learn a cabaret routine and the best dancer will actually get to perform live. Nope. No thanks. Tia summed up it nicely, “the Moulin Rouge ladies are amazing, but their outfits are thongs… so…” Later she said, “I feel butt ass naked.” This is going really well for her.
As interesting as the group date wasn’t, it’s time for the classic two-on-one-someone-gets-left-somewhere-terrible date. And this season, it features the show’s villainous Krystal and sweet angel contestant Kendall.
The ladies and Arie are headed to a French chateau– Kendall hasn’t had much one-on-one time with Arie and Krystal, well, she thinks she’s got this in the bag. Arie pulls Krystal aside pretty quickly and she tells him, “I don’t want to throw away all the color and texture and depth of our relationship.”
Arie is also pretty fixated on the fact that Kendall has never been in love and he’s concerned that she can’t go from never being engaged to someone to getting engaged. Which, honestly– that’s the way it works for most people, most of the time.
Krystal and Kendall get into it more than once, with Krystal attacking Kendall. And Kendall being awesome told Krystal, “Saying the thing that’s most hurtful doesn’t necessarily mean you win. It means you hurt somebody.” After a lot more screen time, Krystal finally gets sent home and the world rejoiced.
But, wait! There’s more. Arie and Jacqueline are now headed out on a one-on-one and this guy is a real piece of work. Arie tells Jac that he’s worried she is too intelligent for him and “I would never want you to give up your dreams to pursue a relationship with me, but…” Arie just wants to wife someone up and head home, y’all.
By the time we get to the big rose ceremony the audience is emotionally drained, but luckily, the Internet isn’t, because they had a lot to say.
13 Hilarious/Sad Tweets About Episode 6 of “The Bachelor” with Arie Luyendyk Jr.: