Summer and grilling go together like peanut butter and jelly. Peanut butter and chocolate. Peanut butter and anything, really.
And almost as much we love peanut butter, we men love grilling. With Summer in full swing, let’s look at some of the must-have grilling accessories every guy must own.
1. A manly apron
“What kind of man wears an apron,” you may be thinking.
Oh, I don’t know. Maybe the kind of man who doesn’t want to ruin his 1991 Atlanta Braves “Worst to First” t-shirt.
And what better way to protect said t-shirt than with an Atlanta Braves apron?
The only problem is figuring out a way to protect your Braves apron. Maybe a second apron to go on top? I’m just brainstorming ideas here.
2. A charcoal grill
Sure, cooking on a gas grill is easier. But since when do men take the easy route?
Food cooked on a charcoal grill simply tastes better than food cooked on a gas grill.
It’s worth the extra effort.
3. Long-handled tongs
Have you ever tried pulling hotdogs off a hot, flaming grill with short tongs?
It isn’t fun.
Long-handled tongs are a must-have grilling accessory for all men who have nerve endings in their fingers, which is probably most of us.
Yes, there are practical reasons for a guy who is grilling to wear sunglasses.
They keep the sun out of his eyes. They help keep smoke out of his eyes. They even help keep gnats out of his eyes!
But let’s be honest. Sunglasses are a must-own grilling accessory because they help the guy look cool while he’s grilling.
5. Insect repellant
As I discussed in 13 Things Every Southern Man Must Own, there are way, way too many mosquitoes and gnats in the South.
Unless you are sadistic and actually enjoy grilling while these flying pests invade your personal space, a good insect repellant is a grilling must.
6. Special seasoning mix
Every man who considers himself a grill master must have a top-secret and closely-guarded mix of spices.
It doesn’t matter if it’s just salt and pepper. It doesn’t matter if it’s all the spices found in the pantry, mixed together with no rhyme or reason. It doesn’t matter if it’s a grill seasoning bought from the grocery store (with its label hastily removed so no one could see).
What’s important is he has one and no one knows what it is!
7. Water gun
“Don’t you mean spray bottle,” you may be wondering.
True, a spray bottle will work just fine if the need to spray a flame arises.
However, if you also want to shoot water at loved ones who walk past you and your grill, spray bottles are merely adequate.
To excel at the job, you need to upgrade to a water gun.
8. Branding iron
The act of branding livestock for the purpose of identifying ownership dates back to the ancient Egyptians.
And thanks to websites like Amazon, men of today can buy branding irons to identify ownership of perfectly-cooked steaks.
Somehow, a steak with your initials burned into it just tastes better. I don’t pretend to understand the science behind it. It just does.
9. Tin foil
Aluminum foil’s versatility isn’t restricted to the kitchen. It’s a super-versatile grilling accessory, too.
Need to clean the grill? Roll some tin foil into a ball and scrape the grill with it.
Need to keep gnats off your food? Cover the food in tin foil.
Need to keep food warm? Wrap it in tin foil.
Need to cook veggies? Toss them with oil, salt and pepper, and wrap them in tin foil. Throw it onto the grill and voila. Grilled veggies.
And if you fear the government or aliens are reading your thoughts, well, the brain-protection qualities of tin foil are second to none.
Have you ever overcooked a steak on the grill? It looks like a worn piece of leather. It’s such a sad sight to behold.
Something that once showed such promise, something that could draw whistles from passersby, suddenly is a shell of its former self.
Which brings us to sunscreen.
Photo Credit: Big Stock