9 Worst Candies to Hand Out on Halloween

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If you’re like me, you almost want kids to skip your house while trick-or-treating, but if you’re also like me, you want to do your best to not be a grump and hand out fantastic treats for neighboring kids. Halloween is a very tricky situation– how much money do I spend? Do I let the kids pick their own treats? Do I turn off the porch light when I’m out of candy and sit quietly for 2 hours as children bang on my door past 9 p.m.? Those quandaries are best meant for a therapy session, but I can tell you what not to do on Halloween: do not hand out crappy candy.

9 Worst Candies to Hand Out on Halloween:

1. Flavored Tootsie Rolls

A flavored Tootsie Roll? Where did you buy them, a garage sale? Don’t even hand out normal Tootsie Rolls. Tootsie Rolls are almost always a little stale, a little hard to chew and not tasty, now imagine trying to convince a kid to take a mango-strawberry Tootsie Roll.

2. Dots

Dots offer no flavor and an unappealing shape. Why don’t they look like dots?

3. Starburst

I know what you’re thinking, but can you guarantee every child a pink Starburst? If not, skip ’em.

4. Bubblegum

Oh, it’s not a candy. Next.

5. Butterscotch Anything, But Mainly Those Round Discs

My grandmother doesn’t even like butterscotch candy and I think she’s supposed to like it.

6. Smarties

Listen, it’s called “trick-or-treating” for a reason. Smarties are not a treat, unless you also consider chalk a treat.

7. Jawbreakers

If the proposed treat is a broken jaw at the end of the rainbow– no thanks.

8. Raisins

Stay away from all fruit, or in this case, dried fruit.

9. Candy Corn

Handing out candy corn on Halloween is just lazy. Might as well give kids your business card.

When it doubt stick to the basics like Snickers, Milky Way, Crunch and M&Ms. You can’t go wrong.

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