Personally, I would like to see a few activities that are a little bit more off-the-grid — for example, Olympic bowling, Olympic tongue twisters or Olympic shuffleboard. Wouldn’t that be fun?
11 Sports That Should Be In the Olympics:
1. Tightrope Walking
Watching someone walk a tight rope tends to cause lots of sweating, breath-holding and heart palpitations — at least, that’s what happens to me. I mean, even get nervous watching college hippies do a Slackline. So, having a professional do it from a couple hundred feet up for Olympic glory? That’s appointment television.
2. Tongue Twisters
Every language has different tongue twisters, so I honestly have no idea how this would actually work. But, it would be funny as heck to watch, right?
3. Team Skydiving
Anytime someone jumps out of an airplane and survives, there’s reason to celebrate.
I imagine Olympic skydiving would be about performing elaborate aerial tricks, but I’d also like it to be a race to the bottom. Basically, everyone would jump out of the plane at the same time, and the last person to pull their parachute wins.
We have to get the kids to watch somehow. Grab some Mountain Dew, get vertical, and throw Taco Bell logos on all the athletes.
5. Competitive Eating
Honestly, I’m not sure why this isn’t already on the Olympic sport menu. No other sport offers the sheer amount of intensity and I-may-vomit mentality as competitive eating.
I’d like it to be a pizza eating contest because that’s something I can personally relate to.
So, for this game, each country’s participants are selected at random one week before the Olympics start. I do not want to see professionals play this game.
7. Dart Throwing
What can I say? It’s dart throwing. There’s a round board, there’s a sharp stick and you throw it in the middle.
Plot twist: poison darts.
8. Tug of War
This is just a good activity for the rugby team to do between matches.
9. Egg Toss
You know PETA would never let them use real eggs or whatever, so they’d have to be some silicone approximation of real eggs.
10. Team Video Games
In an effort to be all-inclusive, they are now allowed to play League Of Legends for a chance to win Olympic gold.
Hey, it’s fun.
Because everyone loves to watch bowling, right? But, in this version of bowling, you get bonus points if you roll the ball between your legs.