A bride and groom’s wedding day is known as their “big day” for a reason. It is their day – their time to shine, and most wedding guests understand this. They know the biggest etiquette rule of the day: Don’t upstage the bride and groom! Unfortunately for one bride, one of her most important guests did not know or care about this big rule. She wrote into Slate‘s “Dear Prudence” column to share her story.
She and her husband had dated, gotten pregnant, and had a child together, and then moved into together. They put off getting married and having a wedding until they reached a point where they felt like they could afford “a huge blowout wedding to celebrate our lives with everyone we know and love.” The stage was set for the most wonderful day of their lives.
They asked her husband’s best friend, “John,” to perform the ceremony. This ended up being a really bad idea.
The bride wrote: “The entire atmosphere felt moving. So moving in fact that John stopped mid-ceremony to propose to his longtime girlfriend, ‘Jane,’ and reveal her pregnancy. I couldn’t even hear the vows my husband wrote or the rest of the ceremony over the noise of Jane’s happy sobs, her very surprised family who were also guests, and people seated nearby congratulating her.”
Then the bride’s videographer (not knowing what to do) cut over to Jane in the crowd. John later apologized during his toast for “being caught up in the moment,” but then went on to talk about he and Jane’s future.
And, if you’re thinking that was the end of all John’s show stealing, it wasn’t. John asked the band to play a special song for him and Jane at the reception.
As you can imagine, the bride was still seething as she wrote to “Dear Prudence.” Neither she nor her husband had spoken to John, and she wanted to know whether, she and her husband should continue to be friends with John, or if they were “angry over nothing.”
“Prudence” advised them to have a hard conversation with John, but that it might be the end of their friendship if John didn’t do some major apologizing.
We’ll never know whether this bride decided to forgive John, or not, but I doubt John will be invited to any major event ever again. Some people just think life’s all about them. Word to the wise: If you have a friend like John, don’t let them officiate your wedding!