A good man is hard to find, and a true Southern gentleman may be even harder to find. In fact, I’m not sure if he even exists anymore. I am led to believe one of three theories about the perfect southern gentleman.
1. He is an extinct (or nearly extinct) species. He existed generations ago, but like the dinosaurs, he is no more; or, perhaps, he never really existed to begin with and is a mythological creature like the loch ness monster or a unicorn.
2. He is an amalgam created by the Southern woman kind of like the game junior high girls play when they create the perfect guy with the head of Ryan Gosling, the body of Channing Tatum, and the personality of Matthew McConaughey.
3. He is the standard by which Southern mothers raise their sons. Instead of saying, “be good so Santa will bring you presents,” they say “Now, son if you want to be a perfect Southern gentleman than you need to act like this.”
Why am I led to believe these theories? Well, it seems most Southern men these days have thrown out the old ways, or, perhaps, they have just forgotten them. In case that’s the reason, here’s a refresher course on how to be a Southern gentleman.