I am a big fan of "Anchorman." It was the first movie I saw twice in theaters. Not to sound too much like our President, but it was huge. You loved it. I loved it. Everyone loved it. But the movie we all saw in theaters was not the original idea, which included plane crashes, baboon assassins, and lots of throwing stars.
We have no words to fully explain what is happening, so let's let the queen diva tell us in her own words.
Ladies and Gentlemen, Mariah Carey:
Only 279 days until Christmas!
Mariah Carey Explained that NYE Fiasco By Saying, "I Literally Am Incapable of Being in the Real World and Surviving"
Since Mariah Carey broke off her engagement with billionaire James Packer last fall and starred on an E! reality show, she's been all over the place. Which was one of the reasons she was asked to perform during New Year's Rockin' Eve in Times Square.
Since that performance she's been all over the place for a different reason-- it was absolutely terrible. The worst of the worst. Carey and her team released several statements on the incident, plus she tweeted, "shit happens," but no statement or tweet could stop the memes or backlash.
Carey recently sat down with Rolling Stone, where she tried once again to explain what happened, "It's just something where if I can't explain it to the entire world, then they're not going to understand it, because it's not what they do. Just like I wouldn't understand somebody who had a desk job and how to do that. I couldn't. I literally am incapable of being in the real world and surviving."
She also went on to say, "This was out of my control, and had everything not been such a total chaotic mess, then I would have been able to make something happen. Even the dancers should have stopped dancing and helped me off the fucking stage. I'm sorry. It was a mess, and I blame everybody, and I blame myself for not leaving after rehearsal."
On Wednesday, Mariah Carey and her boyfriend-of-the-hour, Bryan Tanaka, attended a Clippers game at the Staples Center.
I can't find a picture of them at the game, but I did find a picture of them in a copper bathtub.
Anywho, while they were there, Mariah's song "Fantasy" played over the speakers, and everyone -- including Mariah herself -- sang along.
Though it was only for a second, I'm still laughing.
Side note: where did that microphone come from?
In recent months, Mariah Carey has been back in the spotlight-- she called off her engagement to some billionaire with a yacht, she toured in Europe, claimed again that she doesn't know J. Lo and delivered a performance on New Year's Eve that would upset your grandmother.
On the red carpet before the 74th Annual Golden Globes, Carrie Underwood, a celebrity, was asked the age-old question, "if you could trade places with a celebrity for a day, who would it be?"
While asking, "Who's just fabulous? Mariah Carey!"
The interviewer quickly reminded her that New Year's Eve happened and Carrie reminded her that she's always on yachts being fabulous.
So, not a bad person to trade places with.
And what would happen if Mariah saw this clip?
To make sure 2016 was sent out just the way it should be-- like a pile of heaping trash, Mariah Carey closed out the year with the worst performance of her career on "Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve with Ryan Seacrest."
And since the almost 6 minutes of basically dead air was on TV sets across the globe, Carey has spoken out a number of times-- first with, "shit happens," then suggesting she was sabotaged and more.
First, let's remind ourselves of this: Carey is one of the best-selling music artists of all-time. She is the reason the word "diva" exists as it does today. She's an icon, a legend and up until a few days ago, she was a professional.
Carey and her team are claiming her in-ears were not working properly from the get-go, telling Yahoo! "We walked to the holding tent about 11:20. We told both stage managers — remember this is not our production team, we're out-sourcing our team which we never do — we told them the mic pack is not working. She can't hear it, it's faint. They brought her a new one, and that one didn't work either, the mic pack was dead. They changed the battery pack. She said she still couldn't hear."
According to the article, Carey could hear by the third song, but it was so bad she yelled the now famous line, ""F— it, I've had enough."
Mostly, it seems like it all went wrong because Carey couldn't lip-sync to her tracks, but again, her team is claiming that's not true, "It's not lip-syncing. Lip-syncing is when people don't sing at all. This is what people should understand. Every artist sings to a track, especially in circumstances like that when it's really loud and impossible to have a great musical performance."
Re-watching the performance over and over again and realizing there are very few vocals on the tracks, Carey's team seems to be telling the truth on that one-- it's hard to lip-sync without vocal tracks.
As for their role in the fiasco Dick Clark Productions has called any claims of sabotage on their part absurd, "To suggest that [Dick Clark Productions], as producer of music shows including the American Music Awards, Billboard Music Awards, New Year's Rockin' Eve and Academy of Country Music Awards, would ever intentionally compromise the success of any artist is defamatory, outrageous and frankly absurd. In very rare instances there are of course technical errors that can occur with live television, however, an initial investigation has indicated that [Dick Clark Productions] had no involvement in the challenges associated with Ms. Carey's New Year's Eve performance. We want to be clear that we have the utmost respect for Ms. Carey as an artist and acknowledge her tremendous accomplishments in the industry."
No matter what-- we were able to step into the new year with this wonderful piece of terrible.
I don't know about you, but I have hope for 2017 -- mainly because things can't get much worse.
So, since I have my positivity goggles on and I'm looking hopefully toward the New Year, I've compiled a list of things that my (and probably your) favorite celebrities should do to make 2017 better.
Who knows, maybe they'll actually do them?
21 Things Our Favorite Celebrities Should Vow to Do in 2017:
Justin Bieber should get rid of his 'stache -- for good.
2. Miley Cyrus
Miley Cyrus should go the entire year without sticking her tongue out in a photo.
3. Jason Aldean
Jason Aldean should stop wearing crocs.
4. Johnny Depp
Johnny Depp should stop making "Pirates of the Caribbean" movies.
Leonardo DiCaprio should direct a movie.
Carrie Underwood should release a workout video.
Ariane Grande should give up the ponytail -- it's time for a change.
8. Maren Morris
Maren Morris should release another album.
9. Meg Ryan
Meg Ryan should push for a "You've Got Mail 2."
10. Kelsea Ballerini
Kelsea Ballerini should collaborate with Taylor Swift.
11. Mariah Carey
Mariah Carey should take some time off.
Justin Timberlake should be on "Carpool Karaoke."
13. James Corden
James Corden should get Justin Timberlake on "Carpool Karaoke."
14. Ryan Reynolds
Ryan Reynolds should release a book of his tweets.
15. Chris Pratt
Chris Pratt should take at least one shirtless photo a day.
Jennifer Lawrence should do a standup show.
17. Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen
Mary Kate and Ashley should agree to appear on "Fuller House" -- I mean, c'mon guys.
18. Chrissy Teigen
Chrissy Teigen should start a cooking show.
19. John Stamos
John Stamos should release a book that's just pictures of him throughout the years.
20. Taylor Swift
Taylor Swift should take dance lessons.
21. Miley Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth
Miley Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth should get married -- or start an animal shelter.
Honestly, though I love my friends and family, the only pictures that really spark my interest are the ones of celebrities celebrating Christmas. I know that sounds weird, but I really love seeing how the other half does it.
From fancy cars, to 40-foot-tall Christmas trees, to fat diamonds, their celebrations are so much different than what I'm used to -- and it's so interesting.
This Year's 25 Best Celebrity Christmas Moments:
That's a big tree.
3. Jason Aldean
6. Mariah Carey
I'm sorry, what?
7. Still, what?
8. Again, what?
9. Miley Cyrus
10. Behati Prinsloo
11. Maren Morris
12. Kris Jenner
13. Drew Barrymore
14. Billy Ray Cyrus
15. Meghan Linsey
16. Lady Gaga
19. Kacey Musgraves
20. Jana Kramer
21. Brett Eldredge
22. Thomas Rhett
23. Hilary Duff
24. Khloe Kardashian
25. Jake Owen
26. Kelly Clarkson